Some movie critics actually watch the movie before voicing their opinion. The BaconKnight just watches the trailer. First impressions are everything.
Finally after years of having to put up with Hollywood releasing lame ass vampire love story movies we are finally getting back to what everyone really wants to see. Brutal vampire ass kicking!
First off I would like to say that I think every movie trailer should start with a naked Kate Beckinsale, it’s just good business. It instantly grabs the attention of every man in the world and once you’ve peaked their interest (and their pants) it doesn’t matter what the rest of the trailer shows because you’ve already got a line of men committed to seeing the movie. Luckily the rest of this trailer isn’t boring nonsense, but a bunch of action packed throat slicing.
Beckinsale returns as the vampire warrior Selene for some more tight black leather action. Unlike the last Underworld movie that was a prequel, this one picks up 12 years after the second movie. Selene has been imprisoned in some kind of giant water filled test tube and by the way, did a mention she’s naked? She escapes into a world that has drastically changed.
It seems like the trend of vampire entertainment lately is to no longer make the vampires have to keep their existence a secret and Underworld is going right alone with that trend. The humans are fully aware that vampires and lycans aka werewolves are real and just like typical humans they have decided to play a little game of genocide by trying to wipe them off the face of the Earth.
They don’t come right out and say it but I’m pretty sure the Vampires and Lycans are going to team up to take out their common enemy and the best part is after they defeat them they can eat them. It’d be like me declaring war on all Big Macs, I’m not just going to let them lay there and rot after the battle. That would be wasteful and wrong.
The big question on everybody’s mind is, where’s Michael? In fact Selene screams that exact question at the end of the trailer. The first two movies were basically all about Selene and her vampire/lycan boy toy so I hope he’s in this movie at some point and they don’t just say something like, “Michael? Oh yea, we killed that asshole like 5 years ago.”
If Michael has an off screen death it makes the first two movies completely pointless. Like at the beginning of Alien 3 when the life pod crash lands killing everyone that survived at the end of Aliens except Ripley. It made the whole plot of Aliens pointless. When that little girl when missing they should have just said, “F her.” Then hopped in the escape pod. They would have had a way better chance at living if they just let that little girl be eaten by monsters.
I’m willing to bet this movie is going to be on par with the other Underworld movies and that means it’s going to be good. The only downside I can really see to Underworld Awakening is that it’s in 3D and all that means is I’m going to be annoyed by paying an extra 3 bucks to so see a couple 3D title sequences and vampire throwing star get thrown at the camera. Wow technology.
I give Underworld Awakening a Preview Review of 4 out of 5 Rascals.
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